Zombies Ruin Everything

     The day was going perfectly. The cruise ship, anchored offshore, sat in the water like a ring and perfectly cut sapphire fit into each other. The sand on the beach wasn’t hot as much as it was just comfortably warm and it felt nice between the toes. The sky was such a light blue that it looked like something out of a cartoon. Things just shouldn’t look this pretty. That’s what Heaven is for. But things did look about that good and who was going to complain? It was the perfect day for the tourists to get off the boat and really see the sights. Nobody was happier than Ms. Eastman was happy there. She was nearing sixty and hadn’t gone anywhere since the divorce. Other than work, the only place she ever cared about going to anymore was the grocery store for more ice cream. And it showed, sad to say. She didn’t feel like anyone paid attention to her anymore. So it was time to get out and just go somewhere. Like the women in all those dramedies she had been watching her entire life. Do what you want. Make yourself happy. Life is about you. Those movies and books had much more influence on her than she would ever admit to anyone. Especially overweight divorcees pushing sixty. People like Ms. Eastman.

She couldn’t lie to herself anymore by pretending she wasn’t a little bored on the boat itself, even with all the comedy shows and all the bars. All the towels wrapped like animals when she got back to her cabin just didn’t do it for her (that’s a lie, she really did like the animal towels). Her friends had been telling her that she needed this, she had been telling herself she needed this, but there was something missing. Something she wouldn’t ever speak out loud without the promise of getting her wish. She really went on this trip to travel to an exotic place, get comfortable with her surroundings…and meet somebody. It’s not that she thought it would happen, but it’s just what she really wanted, in the quietest part of her mind. She’d never have gone on a trip like this by herself or with just a few friends, flying in, having to discover everything on her own. No, she needed someone telling her what to do, where not to go, and what NOT to do. She needed her hand held in a place like this, so a cruise ship with a thousand other people around made her feel safe. But because she’d never been there…it felt dangerous. She felt dangerous without there being any real danger. She didn’t want things “Americanized” for her, with tourist shops and traps; she wanted to see the real Haiti, whatever that was. She sort of imagined the “Real Haiti” to be a place where people and animals coexist together with the people being that much civilized. “Yes, that monkey can come into my house and grab a piece of a piece of fruit off the table- but he better jump right back out that glassless window back into the jungle!” But she digressed. With the money she put out for this cruise to Haiti, the locals should have to put on some sort of musical if she should wanted them to, much less, show her the real Haiti . But she wouldn’t of wanted that even if they offered it. Ms. Eastman imagined some kind of foreign marketplace, the natives chatting it up and bartering chickens and rice. Maybe some young blood from a nearby village would take interest in her and they’d start a passionate whirlwind romance and he’d hunt for her the rest of her days while living in a grass hut with only their seven kids and the bare essentials! That’d make them all jealous! That’d let everyone back home know that she didn’t need the deadbeat husband. It was thoughts like these that made it clear she had no idea where she really was. She just wanted someone to pay attention to her.

Wandering off further than she should have, Ms. Eastman neared the closest patch of jungle she could. There wasn’t nearly as much jungle as she had hoped for, so she took what she could get. She started soaking it all in, picking up her little digital camera and taking pictures of things no one on earth would be interested in. She started taking pictures of things a person could photograph in their backyard of plants that were bought from Home Depot and no one would know the difference. But hey, this was her trip, she should have been able to do what she wanted. And she was in the moment, so sue her. After several pictures of plants and sand though, Ms. Eastman was already ready for something new. So it was just her luck that some weird looking monkey came across her path. It was about the size of a cat and its bulbous head reminded her of someone back home. The orange and gray fur was something she wasn’t used to. Especially considering if she had seen this back home, it would’ve been behind bars, playing with its own turd. Here, it was in its natural habitat, doing the things that wild monkeys do! ….Like play with itself. But also in the tradition of Ms. Eastman’s luck, as soon as she tried to take a picture of the primal native, he jumped off his branch and ran deeper into the jungle, further from beach. She thought about going back, but this was her vacation dang it, and if she wanted a picture of this weird looking monkey that slightly resembled her ex-husband, then she was going to get it! Several seconds later, after finding out that the jungle is NOT the place she’d want to live in a grass hut for the rest of her life with seven kids, Ms. Eastman found her model, sitting on a branch about six feet off the ground, gnawing on a piece of fruit and not getting very far. This was the perfect picture for National Geographic. She would sell it and make millions. Okay, maybe not millions, but definitely a few hundred thousand. But just before she took the picture, the little guy dropped his snack, enticing him to fall from the branch onto the forest floor, picking up the fruit and ruining a photograph. Another picture of plants, only this one had a tip of monkey back in the bottom. Ms. Eastman was getting sick of this.

She readjusted her lens. She focused back in on her subject. This was it. The perfect shot. Again. Ms. Eastman had it if this ex-husb-er… monkey would stay still for another two seconds. “Click” went the camera. And she got it. The way she captured him looking at her while chewing on the dirt covered snack, a person would’ve thought she was a professional. And she felt like one. This was the picture that was going to make everyone jealous that they didn’t come on this trip. This one picture made everything else feel worth it. For just a second. Until she realized something was in the shot. Someone’s feet, covered in mud.

She looked up to see a boy about ten standing completely still, covered in a thin layer of mud. Ms. Eastman jumped slightly and let out a brief scream before regaining herself. She had no idea how long he’d been standing there, or what he was doing.

“Um…hi. Or um… Salu?”

The kid, who was obviously a local, stood still and continued his stare off with nothing. Ms. Eastman thought he might have been mentally handicapped. Something was wrong with him. Besides being covered in dirt, his stomach, chest, shoulders, neck and arms had strange markings on them. They looked like they had been…cut into him. And by the looks of it, it was recently. Strange designs that swirled around, that funneled into waving patterns. Designs that would’ve been interesting to look at if they weren’t cut into the body of a ten year old boy. His eyes were dilated and the patterns on his neck looked especially fresh. Maybe a couple days. But what does he look like he was buried??” Ms. Eastman’s mind raced into a thousand different direction, every thought leading off a proverbial cliff. Nothing she was thinking was helping, she needed to do something. Ms. Eastman ran to the boy, no longer irritated that he ruined her shot and only confused and scared for him.

“Oh my word, what happened to you?”

The boy said nothing. Eastman scanned his body looking any clues as to why he might look the way he did. The boy stood still, his body language telling her he might fall asleep at anytime. She looked at his hands. His knuckles were bloody and the skin ripped. His fingernails were broken and chipped down to the flesh underneath. That is, the fingers that even had nails. The skin there, also torn. But his eyes. The eyes were the strangest part. Even more than the cuts, the blood, the tribal markings, the daze….were the eyes. They were completely black. No pupils, no iris. Just black. Like a shark. She stared into them for a moment, forgetting about a hurt little boy and becoming scared for her own life.

“Are…you alright?”

Still, the boy said nothing. Verbally, anyway. His eyes, reflecting a glint of light, seemed to hone in on her neck. Her warm, fat neck. And he took a bite out of it. Not in the way a vampire would if such things existed, with two little perfect holes an inch away from the other. This was a big nasty chunk. He had ripped a chunk out of her neck and wasted no time chewing on it. Ms. Eastman went into panic mode. She pushed him away as hard as she could, onto the ground and into a pit of spikes for all she cared. She ran out the twenty feet it took to the get to the beach, screaming to high Heaven and anybody else that would listen. Kids were scared, adults jumped. Everyone was paying attention to Ms. Eastman now. And what do you know? A little windowless hut, off in the distance.

The next several hours was the most rapid, disgusting, violent display of disease-spreading to ever be recorded. No one knew what to do, what to give her. Ms. Eastman’s symptoms displayed that of several different diseases and conditions. Chills, fever, and at first, the behavior flare ups usually found in a person with an advanced brain tumor. The medical crew on board the ship tried to calm her down, but nothing seemed like it would do it. Until a good twenty five minutes after the initial bite. The crew had imagined it was the sedatives taking much longer to work through her system than it ever had with anyone else, but that wasn’t the case. She was like the little boy who had bitten her. Conscious, but only in the weakest sense of the word. Like when a person wakes up after two hours of sleep when they need nine. But Ms. Eastman was far from going to sleep. No, she wanted to bite and rip and scratch the skin and insides of anyone that came near her. Or anyone that didn’t come near here for that matter. It didn’t show, though. Restraints can have that affect on a person, making a fully awake being seem worn out. Two hours after the initial bite that would later be known as infection, Ms. Eastman got one. She finally got one. Pictures were taken at the time of her gnashing her teeth, the flash catching her eyes at just the right angle to make it look like a demon had possessed her. It was for the medical records, but they looked like something out of a horror movie. A doctor wasn’t paying attention for what couldn’t have been more than a few seconds and Ms. Eastman, thought to be on the verge of a coma, was able to jerk up off her bed just far enough and take the largest bite out of the doctor’s hand that a human possibly could. He stumbled out of the room, several staff running to his aid to help him. He told them he was okay and he didn’t need their help, just some disinfectant and gauze. But after a few minutes, he wasn’t okay and they couldn’t have helped him. The illness was rapidly spreading and in a few minutes, he quietly passed out from blood loss. Everybody noticed the good doctor sulking into a corner by himself to treat his own wounds but nobody noticed him pass out and pass away. One of the head nurses found him a few minutes later and he was legally declared dead. But that didn’t stop him from waking up and wanting to eat someone. So he tried. Starting with the nearest nurse. Then the nearest nurse tried to eat the closest aid. Then the closest aid tried to eat the nearest passenger.  And there were a lot of passengers. Good times.

     The mall was packed today. Saturday afternoon, it’s what’s expected. But that doesn’t make it any less irritating when a person isn’t going to just hang out but to actually buy something and can’t because there are 5,000 people just hanging out. Evan hated it here. But his wife Renee wanted some shoes that you can’t get “anywhere else” so off to the mall they had went. The food court was the only place he didn’t mind, so after shoving through an army of zit-faced teenagers with their pants below their knees, the couple made it to their destination: Roman Empire, Pizza capital of the mall. Where the food is okay and the prices are outrageous. Evan was happy; they were almost out! He noticed Renee had only bought a salad and he tried to talk her into eating more. She wouldn’t budge and he started to get the idea it was a money thing. Not because she was cheap necessarily, but he knew her well enough to know she didn’t like spending too much on herself in one day. They’d bought a picture frame Renee liked and some shoes. That was the real point of going there; the shoes. Evidently, you just couldn’t get them anywhere else. It was a fair trade overall because this particular married couple hanging meant one thing and Evan knew it: Evan would talk, Renee would listen. That was sort of how their relationship worked. And she really did like to listen. And Evan really did enjoy talking. About whatever. Mostly movies and occasionally current events. Although Evan’s most recent topic had been one of particular disdain for Renee. Their conversation/debate had been going off and on throughout most of the day about guns and whether or not Evan could have one. It was a battle for his manhood and he wasn’t going to give up, especially because they went to a place she wanted to go to so they could get shoes and tacky picture frame she wanted. Because that’s what marriage is about right? Keeping score? Maybe not, but that ends up happening sometimes anyway.

“I’m just saying we should think about it,” He started again after finishing his food. He knew she’d know what he was talking about.

Renee sighed heavily because she knew they were running in circles.

“We’ve already thought about it.”

“No, you’ve made up your mind before I was even able to bring it up.”

“Why, Evan? Why do you “need” a gun?

She pushed her long black hair back, her attitude being clear, even for Evan- she was tired of talking about this. He wasn’t. In fact, he sat upright becoming even more excited at the question. More time to explain himself surely meant he’d convince her with this argument.

“I’m just saying, you know? If someone were to break into our house, God forbid it happen, but it could. Where would we be then? We should be ready.”

Renee’s face didn’t change in any way.

“Then we’ll get an alarm system.”

“There are ways around that nowadays.”

“There are ways around a robber getting shot, too.”

She had a point. Evan liked this now; Debate made personal but not quite an argument, a favorite hobby of his.  He came back with “He’s more likely to avoid an alarm system than a bullet in the head!”

Renee sat up, her eyes widening, feeling she finally understood why her twenty-nine year old husband would want to play with a gun. “Yeah, you see? That’s what this is about!

Evan, as smart as he could be, was also the master of ignorance, particularly pertaining to the female mind. “What?”

“You KNOW ‘what?’It’s that whole, macho tough guy thing- you just want to SHOOT somebody!”

Evan laughed. Of course this was somewhat true. Guys like guns and knives because of the idea of using them. And no better way to flaunt masculinity than to overpower someone else. But that wasn’t the only reason and if he gave into that argument, he would be giving in all together. So he just kept laughing and pretended not to know anything. “Whaaaaat are you talking about?”

Renee wasn’t budging.

“Yeah, that’s what this is! You’ve seen so many movies, you want to shoot somebody because you think it’d be cool!” Nail on the freaking head.

“You want me to get you two guns so you can shoot them both at the same time?”

Evan cocked his head and had to smile a bit. “So you’re saying you would buy them for me?”

Renee leaned back. The seriousness seemed to be sucked out of the argument but Evan could still feel a hint of tension was left.

“Oh, sure! Christmas is only a couple months away. You want some grenades too? And then I’ll get you a thing of bullets to wrap around you and I’ll call you Rocky.

“You mean Rambo?”

Renee bobbed her head. “Sure.”

Evan mimicked her head movements and had to help her with her own joke. “Alright, but when we send out Christmas cards, I’m gonna wear the bullets with no shirt and you have to wrap yourself around my leg.”

Renee’s next statement soaked was soaked with sarcasm and Evan loved when she got this way. He tried to keep from showing his love for it back by not smiling. “Oh that sounds great. But if we have pictures taken and no shirt, you have to get a body like Rambo.”

Evan’s brows went down like a caveman. “Yeah, that’s not happening. How about this; you want a kid, right? We can have a kid if I can have a gun.”

Renee rolled her eyes. “Wow, that’d be great parenting, huh? Those are the LAST things I’d want in the house at the same time.

Evan leaned back as though his proposal was literally on the table. “Just saying….fair trade if you ask me.”

Renee switched back to serious mode. “That’s why I’m not asking you. But no, we can talk about having a kid if you want to discuss that…”

All of a sudden, he was sorry he even joked about it and in his mind, desperately tried to find a new topic. “Nooooope, that’s fine, it can wait, the gun can wait.”

Renee enjoyed tormenting him, as serious as she was about having a kid. The two began their argument at the same time, Renee genuinely stating her side while Evan did his best to drown her out. Even as loud as the food court was, the couple was still able to attract attention from nearby customers. The two stopped talking at the same time, Evan started staring at his empty plate. He could feel Renee looking at him to say something constructive. His mind moved quickly, trying to find something to say, specifically a subject changer. We’ve been here before. The mall of course, but the conversation too. Evan broke the silence with something that probably would’ve been best left inside, leaving the silence intact.

“What if I already bought one?”

 “A gun?” Evan knew why Renee was asking. This wouldn’t be the first time she’d used this tactic. State the answer as a question. His response would then have a little more impact on himself, have a little more time to sink in, not just hawking something out real quick. Pace yourself, Evan, she’ll use clever female tricks.

Evan digressed and kept it light, staring. “No, actually I bought a kid. Hoped you wouldn’t notice. It’s cool though because he can survive on Pop-Tarts…”

Renee, needless to say, was un-amused and it showed on her stone cold face, not that even her “serious face” was something to take too seriously. But sometimes, dang it, he just couldn’t help himself. “… not to mention, he doesn’t take up much space. He’s been living in my closet. Hope you don’t mind, sweetie.

His ear-to-ear smile and head tilt finished it off in the most perfectly irritating way. Too bad Renee didn’t want to play anymore and Evan knew he shouldn’t have brought it up. “You didn’t.”

Milliseconds went by and Evan started to really think he shouldn’t have brought it up now. “But what if I already did?”

“You didn’t so we don’t need to worry about it. Because if you did…”

Evan’s eyes faded over to the massive TV hanging from the ceiling behind Renee. A news report showing men in white jumpsuits covering a port like ants at a picnic. Renee hadn’t yet noticed he wasn’t listening to a word she was saying and he was catching little pieces here and there; “…we need to have a serious talk about what we’re spending money on, why we’re sp…”

Renee must’ve realized Evan’s eyes were glued to the TV because she turned to see what was on and she turned back. She made it clear she thought he was just ducking out of a finances discussion.

“No, no, no- you’re not changing the subject by acting like you care what’s on the news. You don’t even watch the new-

“Shh, shh, shh! What is this? Just watch it…”

Evan’s eyes never broke contact with the TV, Renee must’ve taken him a little more seriously now because she actually listened. For just moment, Evan broke contact with the TV and noticed the entire mall had been silent at this point. There wasn’t a soul there that wasn’t watching the news. Man, how long has everyone been so quiet? Even the irritating wannabe gangsters stopped their idle conversation to watch. The only noise in the place beside the fryers was the oversized TV. The report was already underway as Evan started to listen in again and it seemed as though Renee’s head was turned almost completely around. Curfews for most counties in the state scrolled at the bottom of the screen. The reporter continued his segment.

“…it has not yet been confirmed just yet as to how this disease is being spread but we have everyone working on that as we speak. Officials still urging families to stay indoors for the time being, although not yet mandatory. We have learned that the symptoms of those infected are the exact same symptoms that the crew members of the Expiscor have shown. If you remember, the Expiscor was the cruise ship that returned from the Caribbean Islands a little more than a week ago. Nearly all the crew and vacationers appeared to be suffering from an illness that has still not been identified. All infected with this mysterious disease were quickly detained in the quarantine department of St. Peter’s Memorial Hospital in the downtown area. No word on whether or not the events on that case and what’s going on now are related, but it appears extremely likely. We’ll be back after a quick commercial break. More on these stories as they develop, stay with us.”

     Evan’s face showed his concern. Concern, not worry. Yet. One reason for not watching the news is how easy he swallowed everything, the next natural step for him was to regurgitate it, and think about whether or not it was even really happening, or at least to the degree the news was showing it. This process was even involved with the severity of a storm, much less some unknown plague. Wait, did they say plague? Or just disease? There’s a difference, right? This is too much to think about on a day off.

“Let’s go home.”

     Renee looked back. “What? Why?”

Evan stood up, grabbing her bags. “I just think it’d be a good idea.”

     Evan pulled up to the light a little too roughly. He had been ready to leave but with people seeming a little more on edge with that news report, it seemed to make things all the more frantic. Renee’s mom’s voice could be heard through the phone. Evan couldn’t make out what she was saying to Renee, but he was able to hear her. She sounded like one of the adults from Peanuts. Renee was becoming more and more agitated with every answer, as much as she cared about the situation, as much as she loved her mom.

“…Can you hear me? I don’t know. No, I don’t know, the phone keeps breaking up. No, we’re heading home right no- No, Mom, he’s driving.

Renee slightly turned her head to Evan, who seemed like she was getting ready to blow a fuse, going quietly insane, fidgeting in her seat. Evan sensed this but if he was going to be stuck in traffic, he should at least be able to listen to his music.

“Mom wants to know if we’re still coming to dinner tomorrow night.”

Evan rolled his eyes and loudly whispered, “Tell her to stay inside.”

Renee returned to her mom. “He says he hopes so. Mom, I’m gonna go, okay? Stay inside and lock the doors. I’m gonna go now Mom, my phone keeps breaking-“ Renee stared at her phone as if it offended her. “That’s weird, my phone never does this.”

Now that she was done messing with her phone, she seemed to start taking in her surroundings. She always did this by subtly squinting her eyes and slowly scanning the area. Evan always loved this. “How long have we been sitting here?” she asked.

“Longer than I want to be. Look.” Evan pointed right down the road to other stoplights. They were blinking. Evidently there was some sort of wreck but there were so many cars huddled together, it was hard to see. Renee always got sympathetic so quickly.

“Oh, I hope no one was hurt.”

“Somebody was. Ambulances are all over the place.” Evan shook his head and quietly murmured to himself, “What the heck is going on?”

A police officer with a bright yellow vest who obviously didn’t want to be in the middle of a chaotic four-way intersection waved them on. Renee had worked herself up just enough for a question that would put her on edge depending on Evan’s answer.

“Does this have anything to do with what’s going on with the news, do you think?”

Evan tried to keep it light and vague.

“I have no clue. Let’s just get home.”

Home was about twenty-five minutes South from where they were, the actual city being about twenty-five minutes North of the mall. It was a pretty quiet neighborhood for the most part except for the house at the end. The owners were suspected of dealing drugs to teenagers looking to get a certain amount of “cool points” by buying from them. But that didn’t disturb Evan or Renee’s daily routines. Just a concerning thought when brought up. They pulled into the driveway, Evan was in something of a rush to zone out watching TV and hope everything on the news would blow over. Terrorist threats staying threats or actually being carried out were, in many cases, a nuisance. He hadn’t known anyone directly related to any bombings so for the most part, like the kids down the street selling crack or smack or grass or Hawaiian Ice or whatever it was, it didn’t hit him the way it should of. He wasn’t uncaring. He just didn’t know what he could do to care more. Listen to more talk radio? Watch the news more? Get everybody’s side in the matter, form my own ill-conceived opinion, then shove my views down everyone around me’s throat? He’d rather watch The Office. But all of these thoughts were just on the trip home. Actually pulling into the driveway, his mind turned into that of a kid getting home from school. That kid doesn’t want to think about homework. He wants to watch some loud, obnoxious TV show. And Evan didn’t want to think about terrorist attacks. He wanted to watch some loud obnoxious TV show. Or The Office. Either way, he was home free.

Renee had other minor things to worry about as well. Their neighbor, Josh, who lived behind them, was outside. If he was home, he was outside. Swimming, tanning. Swimming so he could get a tan. It’s always been a habit for Renee and Evan to enter their home through the backdoor and therein lied the problem. Josh would always see them. And he always wanted to talk. Their backyards faced each other and Josh was always there. He didn’t want to talk about things that were interesting either, but about how great he was or how great the things he’d done were. He loved telling anybody about his sexual exploits and conquests with the women at work. The only story Renee wanted to hear about was Josh contracting an STD. But they’d never get that story unless it came with a story about how he got it from a “really hot chick.” But today the woman Josh had brought home was especially hot. Relaxing on his lawn chair, she looked at home, as if she’d always lived there.

Renee tried to rush in through the backdoor but didn’t think to look for her keys until she was actually at the door.

“Crap, crap, crap…” she said to herself. Evan casually strolled in. He wasn’t a lawn care specialist by any means but he always admired how green Josh’s backyard. He’d never even mentioned it to anyone, it was a stupid thing to bring up. But when he got the chance, he’d always look. That might have been part of the problem; Evan looks at Josh’s yard, Josh sees Evan looking in his direction, and BAM: instant terrible conversation. Renee found the keys but then had to find the right one. Evan still wasn’t paying attention to Renee’s obvious rush.

“Who’s Josh with?”

“I don’t know. I don’t know. Just don’t look over there, he’s probably already seen us.

Evan looked over instinctively after being told not to. It was in his blood. Right on cue, Josh was already staring. He raised his hands, displaying his tan and ripped abs. The kind of guy you love to hate. And he made it easy. His wave was really nerdy for such a “cool” guy which had always made Evan suspect he wasn’t always Mr. Fake Tan, and at some point might have been Mr. Dungeons and Dragons. He also loved to yell everything he said.

“HEY! EVAN! RENEE! WHAT’S UP?” He finished it off with an annoying laugh even though nothing funny had been said. Renee held her eyes shut for a moment, knowing Evan would take the bullet for her by talking to Josh. Or maybe she was hoping that he would ignore Josh too because she put her head against the door and it didn’t look like she was going to answer. It was Evan’s fault anyway. He shouldn’t have looked over. Evan didn’t mind as much. It was kind of a joke to him, how into himself Josh was. It’s great to have confidence but for your entire life to revolve around yourself seemed…empty. That’s probably one reason he wasn’t married. Or cared to have a relationship lasting more than a night. Evan began to walk to the backyard fence to meet Josh who practically hopped out of his pool. Evan subtly turned to Renee as she waited at the door. “It’s alright, this’ll just take a second.” He assured her under his breath before he turned back around to Josh who had pimp walked down to the fence. “Josh, how’s it going man?”

Evan tried to shake Josh’s hand but Josh went for the weird “bro” shake, which Evan could never figure out. Everybody’s is faintly different, how is everybody supposed to know what to do? Josh finished it up with the no armed hug, putting his shoulder into Evan’s chest, wetting Evan’s shirt. Swimming in October. Huh.

“It’s okay, it’s okay.” Josh smiled and turned around to check out the woman in the chair. “It’s about to be going a lot better if you know what I mean. He laughed even though it wasn’t funny. Come to think of it, he usually laughs at the end of his sentences. Evan always expected the women Josh brought home to be girlfriends. He still hadn’t learned.

“New girlfriend?”

Josh smirked. “She wishes.”

Evan waved to the girl who waved back weakly. “What’s her name?”

“Karen. Or Gwen. Something like that. Met her at the gym. Today.” He laughed again. Evan kind of forced a little chuckle out but he wasn’t as impressed as Josh was. He just wanted to watch TV. But that was until he actually saw Karen. Or Gwen. Whatever her name was. She didn’t look relaxed like he thought she did from where he was. Now she just looked….dead.

“Is she okay? She looks a little sick.”

Josh scoffed as if Evan was trying to belittle his “prize.”

“Yeah, she said she felt a little dizzy. Probably throwin’ the weights around too hard. You see that stomach though? Whoo… I give her an eight and a half.”

There was no doubt the woman was at least an eight by any guys’ standard. The problem was, besides looking as though she had passed out, was the bandage tightly wrapped around her ankle over what looked like some sort of third degree burn. Josh didn’t draw any attention to that though and Evan just stared. “What’s up with Renee? She don’t like me no more?” Josh wouldn’t have asked if he really believed it, or at least that’s how Evan saw it. Truthfully, Evan always figured that Josh thought that if he really wanted Renee, he could have her. But that he liked Evan enough to not ruin the “friendship” he had with him. What a guy. But that’s a thought Evan would never speak out loud. What would’ve been the point to telling anyone? Josh waved to Renee and of course, laughed a little. Renee forced a smile and weakly waved back. Renee wouldn’t want Evan to cover for her but he did anyway. Or maybe it was more for himself at the moment.

“No, no, no… she just… she’s a little sick. She needs a nap.”

Josh didn’t seem to hear any of what Evan said. “HEY RENEE! HOW YOU DOIN’, BABY?”

Renee’s tight lipped smile should’ve been obvious to anyone any closer than Josh was.

“Doing fine, Josh. You know how I love when you call me baby. How are you?” She wasn’t even trying to be convincing on that last part, Evan thought.

Josh smirked “Well, I’m about to be doing a lo-“ Josh turned back to see if the lawn chair woman was listening. Nope.

“I’m about to be doing A LOT b-“

Evan couldn’t take it anymore. He was ready for couch and TV.

“HE’S ABOUT TO BE DOING A LOT BETTER!”

Inside the house, everything felt great. Evan and Renee (but especially Evan) felt like they were away from every wrong thing on the planet. If Josh comes to the door, we can just pretend we’re dead. That’s how Evan thought of home anyway. Safety in brick and mortar. And whatever else the house was made with. But safety didn’t mean they were free from thinking about how irritating their neighbor was. Renee was especially annoyed whenever they saw him.

“I can’t STAND him!”

Evan was still a little bothered by the woman on the lawn chair.

“Did you see that woman he was with?”

“Yeah. I saw today’s catch. But not the other day. But I did the day before that….

Evan was actually concerned with the woman’s battle wound, not so much Josh being a man-whore.

“Did she look sick to you?”

Renee was on the warpath though. “Isn’t that what he goes for? The sick ones? The weakest of the herd? How else is he going to get a girl if she’s not sick or just plain stupid?”

“No I meant sick, sick. Like, ‘bleeeeh…’” Evan casually imitated puking along with his sound effect with his hands in front of him, as though you catch puke or something.

“I don’t know, Evan. I couldn’t see that far. I try to keep my distance in case Josh discovered a new STD we don’t know about.”

Evan thought about it for another few seconds before letting his brain throw it in the mental compactor. Hm. On to the living room. He plopped down on the couch in one smooth motion, if ‘smooth’ and ‘plop’ can go in the same sentence. He turned the TV on, skipping past on the boring sports channels and straight to The Office. Great show. Renee soon followed and stood in the doorway, staring at Evan as if insulted her.

“Um… hello?”

Evan was just getting into the episode and was already laughing. “What?”

“Did we come home early so you could watch this episode for the 7th time?”

Evan had sincerely forgotten why they had come home so early but  he was getting back on track. Kind of. Oh yeah. The news. Fuuuuun….

Evan flipped through to the station that seemed least likely to exaggerate the facts at the time. Renee sat down next to him, ready for a night of excitement, intrigue, and whatever else Don Foree, Channel 3 Action News anchor could offer. He was still in the middle of reporting when the couple joined in.

“….where many of the Expiscor’s crew members are under very careful observation. Officials have also stated that all of the infected, given a very short amount of time become very slow, yet highly volatile. Very slow with quick sporadic outbursts of energy all directed toward hurting the person closest to the victim. Anyone near or harboring infected individuals should stay as far away as possible. Okay, we bring you breaking news story as we join our eye-in-the-sky news correspondent, Mark Freeman, where on I-75, near down town, an oil tanker has actually overturned, already costing thousands of dollars in property damage that we know of. Mark, are you with us?”

     Renee got more and more freaked out by the minute. But it wouldn’t do any good to say anything. There wasn’t a connection between the chaos on the highway and this strange disease, was there? Suddenly the news cameras changed shots from a news room to a helicopter, shaking and uncertain. The camera moved down to show exactly what the anchor had said: an overturned tanker truck on the highway. The difference was, he hadn’t described everything the camera showed. Maybe the evident chaos had been more serious than either Evan or Renee had realized. In fact, that’s definitely what it was. The entire highway was in disarray. Random fires everywhere; whether they had been set by people or from the truck was unclear. The tanker truck itself look like a beached whale. It was as big as the things get. The kind of truck you try to stay two lanes away from when you drive. Smashed cars lay toppled all around it. The “eye-in-the-sky” kept talking but he was only describing what was visible anyway. Or at least what anybody with common sense could figure out. For whatever reason, the truck mimicked the Titanic more or less, the cement median in the middle of the highway playing the iceberg. It looked liked the idiot driver just scraped further and further up the median until it toppled, destroying several cars in the process. There weren’t any cops, paramedics or firemen anywhere. The strangest part though wasn’t the lack of government authority, but the people who were there. There must have been thirty people just……walking around. Maybe they were in shock? Thirty people in shock, all experiencing it the same way? By walking around in a daze toward the crushed cars?

     They couldn’t have been looters. Looters would be running. And trying to get anything of value out of these cars would be like trying to get dirt out of a screw head with your finger. Evan thought about it for a little bit longer, but not much longer after these wandering thoughts, the people in the highway’s intentions were clear. The “what,” was anyway. The “who” and the “why” became even more dire. The reporter who had been describing the carnage finally broke his daily humdrum monotone voice to scare the piss out of everyone that was listening by screaming “OH MY GOD! ARE YOU SEEING THIS?!?” So much for professionalism. If his next line were to be “I just peed on myself,” it would’ve been fitting for how scared he sounded. The camera jerked over to what essentially seemed to be under the helicopter. More wreckage of course, but even more people tearing at several cars, finding something more valuable than jewels, money, or anything else “looters” might have wanted: human lives. The people on the road dragged out what looked like a man in his thirties and a woman of a similar age, possibly a married couple. “OH MY GOD,” the reporter continued, escalating everyone’s tension. “ARE YOU SEEING THIS?!?” YES, WE ARE SEEING IT. PLEASE SHUT UP. But what the camera jerked over to reveal next was worth screaming the same phrases over and over again. Another crash. Another group of strangers pulling someone out of their car. The woman tried to fight but there were too many people against her. Once they got her out, their next move took Evan completely out of the situation. It took him to a mental place he hadn’t been to since he almost drowned when he was seven. Just somewhere to organize and file what his eyes had just seen. To process things so he could continue with his life and pretend to be normal. His mouth opened, the closest he’d ever get to his jaw dropping in all seriousness. Under his breath, practically mouthing “What…?” Renee actually covered her face. And for good reason. The mob was now eating people. Ripping them apart and eating them.

     The correspondent continued talking but sounded as though he could’ve cried. “It looks as though some of the people involved in this string of accidents have started attacking other people. This is very hard to describe and even harder to watch. It’s just awful. We’d gotten unsubstantiated calls of violent groups attacking people for no reason out in the streets but hadn’t seen anything like this until now. Violence among all this wreckage, um, and help doesn’t appear to be anywhere. This is just absolute chaos.”

The bottom of the screen had started scrolling through all the counties for IMMEDIATE CURFEW. Renee had finally chosen to say something after biting into her bottom lip for the longest time. Not that she could’ve been blamed for clamming up after what she had just seen. “That’s it? Where are the ambulances? Where the cops? The SWAT teams or whoever? They’re just NOT going to show up?!”

Evan continued staring at the TV, which had gone back to the news room. “Don’t know.”

 Renee became slightly annoyed. “Would you quit saying that? You keep saying that!”

Evan couldn’t help but laugh a little. “I’ve only said it twice! Quit asking questions I don’t know the answer to!”

“Is this going to be one of those things where there’s just like, giant riots in the streets and the worst comes out in everybody, even people like us?”

“Probably.”

“Shut up!”

Evan couldn’t help but laugh again. “You asked!”

Then came the pause. The pause when everybody knows what’s going to happen and Evan would have to go out of his way to ruin it further. He knew she just wanted a serious answer. That’s what made it so tough to not make that last joke. He would start off serious and end by saying something completely idiotic. It would hilarious. But he didn’t do it. He could be serious for a little bit. “Okay, what do you mean?”

She was ready with her answer. “I mean like those people who only follow the rules because they would get in trouble otherwise. Like serial killers or those demented ex-Marines or something.”

“What have you been watching?”

“Evan, this stuff is around more than you think.”

“Bull crap. I call bull crap.”

“I’m not done.”

“Alright then, keep it going.”

“I’m just talking about those people who have a twisted view of the world. The ones who have no problems with hurting, murdering, stealing-“

“-raping.”

“Yeah, raping too. The only thing that keeps them from doing it is the law. If that’s gone then-“

“Alright, alright, alright. You’re thinking about this whole thing way too much. There’s a bunch of crazy people out there, yes, but that doesn’t mean the whole world’s gone to Hell.

Renee shook her head. She couldn’t help but treat Evan like a kid when they argued. That is, if he wasn’t the one who was mad. “You’re not thinking about it enough,” she said.

Evan shook his head to the side as if getting something off of the top. “Which is how I like to keep it.”

There was another pause. Like the last one Evan knew he needed to get serious again. “Look, who knows? We’ll figure this out and move on.” He took on a cartoonish, redneck accent and moved his jaw to the side. “This is AMERIcuh!” Then he straightened himself out, verbally. He was in a comfortable spot on the couch, there was no way he was moving. Renee never minded his dumb jokes in between serious statements. It’s the constant joking is what got to her. But that’s why he would do it. But now came the serious talk.

“And that’s how it’s always been, right? We have a problem, we figure it out, and no matter how bad things get, we always move on. So whatever this whole…” Evan waved his hand around the TV. “…thing is…somebody will figure out what to do, and clean it up. Maybe not perfectly, but it will get done.”

Renee looked a little more satisfied than before but that still wasn’t enough as she shrugged a bit more. Evan liked talking and didn’t mind furthering his idea anyway. “Remember when you were younger and you went away to visit your grandma? There was that massive tornado, what was the name of it?

“They don’t name tornadoes, you know that.”

Evan kept a straight face while saying the dumbest thing he could think of. “The news lies. Tornadoes have names. That tornado’s name was Bill.”

Renee laughed a little. “Shut up.” But of course, Evan continued.

“Well, you remember how it felt then? When you were at your grandma’s for over a week with no power, no heat, and no water that wasn’t bottled and even that was running out. It felt like it was going to last forever, didn’t it?” Renee nodded. She knew where he was going with this but she still wanted him to finish. “You never thought it would end. But how long ago was that? Seven years ago last month I think. Yeah. Seven years ago. And you’ve been living your life as though it never happened. The point is, this is no different. We can’t say how you would’ve turned out if you hadn’t gone through it but as bad as it was, it’s all over now. If anything, you appreciate electricity and running water more than most of us and I appreciate you even more.”

Renee didn’t say anything. But she didn’t really need to. Point well taken, it felt. She moved closer to Evan. He could’ve ended it there but he was on roll and wanted to go for the sake of talking. “That’s how this is going to be. Horrible things happen that are completely out of our control but we deal with and come out on the other side even stronger than before. And maybe just that much crazier. And this whole “eating people” thing… that’s probably just being blown up by the newscasters.

Renee became slightly disconcerted by Evan’s last statement.

“I could’ve done without you mentioning that.”

“…Because why would anyone watch the news if there were anything remotely positive being said? It’s like Ben Franklin said, ‘We must all-

“Evan.”

“-hang together…What?”

“Be. Quiet.”

“You got it.”

Evan flips to the Office again. Nice. A marathon. His eyes closed for a moment in complete relaxation. His wife at his side, on the couch, watching the greatest show on earth. Until he remembered something. He jerked up off the couch. “Ah, crap!”

“What? What’s wrong?”

“I forgot. Essays to grade.”

“Just do it tomorrow, you’ve got all day.”

“I can’t read all of them tomorrow, there’s way too many. And with these kids’ handwriting, it’ll take all night.”

“It’s 11^th grade English, are most of those kids going to want to write more than a paragraph?

“They didn’t want to write a sentence but it’s supposed to be at least two pages. Six classes, at least twenty five students in each- you do the math, it hurts my head.”

Renee still didn’t see it as too big a deal and Evan knew it. He’d had to regularly remind himself that she was a nurse and had to deal with life and death on a pretty regular basis so kids not wanting to write wasn’t a big deal on the grand scale of things. Not that she ever gets used to the ‘death’ portion. There was an occasion where she had to help in saving a kids life that had been shot at the school Evan taught at. The kid made it, but he’d be paralyzed from the waist down. Evan had even taught the kid before and became an after school tutor for a while since the kid was so embarrassed about being in class with a wheelchair and all. That was particularly rough on the married couple. It wasn’t as though Renee didn’t think education was a big deal, but patience was key, as far as she was concerned. It seemed natural that kids wouldn’t want to write. Evan knew she didn’t particularly care for it when she was in school and she assumed it had only gone even further downhill. She was more of a math chick. But Evan was still ranting. Because digressing is for quitters.

“You know, I overhear most of my kids I actually hear them say things like (his voice went low)’I HATE reading!’ and ‘Reading is so STUPID, why do we have to do it??”

Renee sighed. “And…?”

Evan was shocked at her response. He paused while they both stared. Evan let out a noise that sounded like the beginning of the word “what” but it was really just a noise.

“Why do we have to do it?!” What kind of question is that?? You don’t have to do it unless you want to be a functioning member of society! You know what they sounded like to me at that point? A freaking caveman.”

“Yes, that sounded a little slow, but you don’t like math.”

“That’s different.”

Renee scoffed. “How?”

“Uh…let’s see. Today I read the paper just so I could have some vague idea of what was going on around me. On the way to the mall, I had to read that big red sign that said “STOP” and I had to know what it meant so I wouldn’t kill anybody, you know, no big deal. And then, I read that fat chick’s pants that said “cutie pie” on the butt just s I could my belief that ugly people are becoming more vain. You know what I didn’t use?”

“What?”

“Perimeter formulas function notations, and vector. I don’t even remember what that is.”

Renee laughed a little. “Yeah, I see your point, but they probably just mean reading books.

“That just sounds like laziness to me. Speaking of laziness, let’s sit on our fat butts and watch TV. Funny TV. Not depressing, real life violent TV.”

The clock went from 4:39 p.m. to 11:11 p.m. in what seemed like no time and forever at the same time. Renee and Evan slept six and half hours. That’s what no sleep the night before and then driving to a crowded mall will do to a person. Evan was having a nice dream until his flying lessons with Steve Carell turned into the girl with the “cutie pie” pants throwing him down a cliff. He woke up to the emergency broadcast screen on TV. He’d never seen it before in real-life, if that’s what you can call it. He slowly stood up, Renee still asleep. He started to call his parents after realizing they hadn’t talked yesterday and he promised he would call them back. By the time he realized he hadn’t called them, it was way too late. He was still keeping his promise, just not to the tee that they’d probably have hoped.    

Great. The phones have no signal. His service was usually pretty good but every once in a while, he found a dead spot. So he walked a few feet away from where he was, looking out the window and dialed again. There were a bunch of people hanging around the end of the street. Those freaking drug dealer kids. They weren’t actually kids, but early twenties. They acted like kids. They must’ve all been high too because they were walking around like they’d just woken up. Idiots. The phone still wasn’t working. Evan walked to the backdoor looking out the window. Josh’s lights were all still on. In some way it was a relief. Human life. Kind of.

Evan went back to the living room where Renee was stretching on the couch. She always looked good. She looked at the TV screen.

“What’s going on? What is this?”

“Uhh… It’s a new TV show: ‘See How Long You Can Watch This without Wanting to Stab Your Eyes Out.’ Have fun.”

Evan put on his jacket. He always laid it right next to the coat hanger which was never used. Gift from Renee’s grandpa. Renee cocked her head. “Where are you going?”

“Phones aren’t working, news is off the air, Josh’s lights are on. I’m going to see what the dillio is.” Renee stood up. He already had her body language figured out. Time to put me in the corner.

“NO, you’re not going outside, Evan. There’s a curfew!

“I can’t go in my own backyard??”

“UM- NO. That’s that point of a curfew. You stay inside.”

“I’m going over there real quick to see if his phones are working. It won’t be a big deal.”

“No, I don’t want-

“Renee- it’s fine. You can watch me from the window if you want. It won’t take five minutes. And I know how you loOOove to watch me go.”

She shook her head and rolled her eyes. And she couldn’t forget the irritated sigh. She had to throw that in anytime Evan got that little “man” streak in him and she couldn’t really do anything about it. She knew women who kept their guys in check by threatening to leave anytime they wanted their way, but that was just wrong. Let him be a jerk. She’d had her moments too. Evan walked over and tried to kiss her on the lips in a loving, but also an “I win” victory kiss. She put her hand up over mouth and push him away when he tried to make the connection. Denied! He laughed anyway because he still got his way, to a point. He’d get one later.

Evan walked into the bed room and into his closet. He looked over his shoulder discreetly. Underneath a few of his TV show/ video game shirts he’d had since he was a teenager, he pulled out his sleek, black Jericho 941. A gun, for the laymen. He put it under his geeky t shirts because Renee didn’t even want to touch them. If she knew he’d bought this thing, she’d probably take it from him and shoot him with it. He slid it under his olive drab jacket and walked to the backdoor. Before he walked out, he realized Renee was still in the same spot, arms crossed.

“What’s wrong?” In a second, he’d be sorry he asked. Evan had a gun but she was the one unloading.

“I told you I didn’t want you going out there and you’re still  going and I keep thinking about all those people on the news attacking eating people and even if you have to go out there, I don’t want you going to Josh’s house of all people…”

“Hey, hey, hey- calm down, alright?? We’ll all figure out what’s going on. Besides, all that stuff is happening toward the city anyway so we should be okay for now. I’ll be right back, no big deal. Besides- I’m a tough guy. Somebody tries to touch me I’ll go all “Game of Death” on them.

Evan held up a tightly wrapped fist and breathed heavily through his mouth he tightened up like an ‘O,’ Bruce Lee style ”Now gimme a hug.”

Evan walked out the backdoor. He could see his breath. The temperature must’ve dropped thirty degrees in the past few hours. He could see his breath. There wasn’t much to see on either side of his house thanks to the trees but the moon was as bright as a streetlight. It lit up his backyard with a wide path to Josh’s backyard, which was nice but that still didn’t mean it was enough light. Especially for a loner going through his backyard in the middle of a terrorist attack. A sun would’ve been nice right now. He started walking and looked back to Renee. And what he saw actually creeped him out a little more. He couldn’t see her face and in the dark, it looked like something out of a ghost story. He knew she was looking at him and just in case she could see him, he held up his fist and made his Bruce Lee face again. In some ways though, it was almost to comfort him. We laugh to keep from crying, they say. Evan wished he had a dog. Like Mad Max or something. Didn’t Mad Max have a dog? Yeah, I think it was a Cattle Dog. Or a Sheep Dog. If I HAD a dog with me, I’d use him as a weapon. Random, distracting thought were great when walking through the dark. But then he caught himself distracting himself and forced himself to think horrible violent things that could be going on in other parts of the world.

After climbing over the nearly pointless four foot high fence, he treaded past the several feet it took to get to Josh’s pool. There was a dark spot where Josh’s girlfriend was. Looked like it was in the shape of a footprint but Evan wasn’t going to check. This is the house where STD’s hang out. Drugs down the street, STD’s here. He walked around the house and to the front door. Eleven o’clock wasn’t that late, was it? Now, he started wondering. Too late to go home now. He’d  already argued to get here. If he went back now he’d be a dog with his tail between his legs. He needed to come back with the Frisbee. Then he stopped comparing himself to a dog at all because he’d rather be a wolf, bringing back the night’s kill. Yeah, I like that a lot better. He started to knock but the door was already cracked open. He slowly and barely popped his head in.

“…Hello? …Josh? Your door’s open, I’m coming in, alright? Nobody be naked!” He slipped in and slowly shut the door, not touching the handle. If he had touched the handle, he would’ve noticed the trace of bloody fingerprints on the it. Once the door was shut and all seemed quiet, a noise was heard coming from the kitchen. Kind of like a pig at the trough.

“Hellooooo….?”

Josh was home, alright. But only in the loosest sense. He was lying on the kitchen floor in his underwear. His stomach was torn open and various chunks of him had been bitten and ripped out. His throat wasn’t in his neck anymore but scattered throughout the kitchen. Karen or Gwen or whatever her name was kneeling over him on her knees. She was using her hands to dig into his stomach and eat whatever parts she was pulling out. She was so greedy in her movements that she hadn’t even noticed Evan standing there. Until he took a step back and the floor creaked. Her head shot up and stared like an animal before it pounces. Evan didn’t have time to go to his “special place” because as far as he could figure, what was on the news had finally hit home. If we laugh to keep from crying, Evan was cracking up.

     There was a yellowish-green color to her iris. The white in her eyes wasn’t white. It was red. It was so bloodshot, Evan could only see red. This isn’t happening. This isn’t happening. This isn’t happening. The woman, if that’s what he could call her, stood up. Blood that had pooled in crevices of her robe poured down the creases that were left. She took a step toward Evan. He took a step back and aimed his gun as steadily as he could. As closely resembling cops he had seen on TV. He was breathing hard. Her next step was onto the foot with the ankle wrapped in a bandage. It was especially disgusting. Her entire body was a grey color. Veins everywhere and she had dents in her head. Josh put up a fight maybe? Her steps onto her foot with the wound that stretched up her leg were limp. Her mouth opened and blood poured out. She looked like she had been dead for days. Is this really happening? She looked like a freaking Maxim model a few hours ago. A strange, guttural growl emanated from her snarling lips. Evan tried to stay in the moment. He tightened his grip on the trigger.

“LADY, Stay BACK!”

She continued hobbling toward him. Even faster now.

“Lady, PLEASE, stay back, I DON’T want to shoot you!”

She kept coming. Evan pulled the trigger and blasted her in the shoulder. The hit area jerked back as if it were attached to a leash. To Evan’s horror, she didn’t stop. She didn’t seem to feel it, save for the initial jerk. Now that this was happening, Evan could go to his special place. His “Nothing box.” Not that he should go, but he could. He was in complete disbelief and expected to wake up. He wished he could wake up. His gun lowered slightly. He raised it back up by sheer memory of what he should do, not because he was paying attention.

Coming back to reality, he readied himself again on Josh’s would-be fling. Just before he fired again, a second woman came around the corner. She had the same features. Where did she even come from?? Josh really was a dog! The second woman made her way to Evan. Limping forward. She had a gash or some sort of laceration in her neck that looked worse than the rest of her. She was closer to Evan so the only natural thing to do in such an unnatural situation was blow her away. She was closer. But still, he hesitated. The woman reacted to the gun the same as the first- nothing. She just kept coming. He gritted his teeth this time although it seemed easier to tighten the trigger.

“Don’t, don’t, don’t…”

The woman snarled the same as the first and lunged as if on command, almost supernaturally fast unlike the rest of their movements, slow and unresponsive. A short-lived screech tore from her mouth before Evan fired into her face and she went backward, hitting the ground like a sack of rotten vegetables.

By this time, Karen (or Gwen) had made her way to Evan. He hadn’t been paying attention. He just shot a woman in the face. She appeared to be a woman, anyway. Her last noise was questionable, to say the least, about what she actually was. Karen took a hold of his jacket and leaned into him. He tried backing away but tripped over a chair leg, Karen falling right on top of him and knocking the gun just out of reach. Great. Death in Josh’s house. People are going to find my body and think some Satanic orgy was going on here. How embarrassing. When he saw this woman hours earlier, the last thing that would’ve went through his mind was that she would chew his head off that night. Evan’s right arm was wrapped around her head, keeping her head back by her hair as she snapped at him like wrangled crocodile. She was literally going for the jugular. Now, he came to. Yes, this is really happening. This is really happening.

With his left hand, Evan reached for the gun. It took a moment seeing as how he was so focused on this crocodile woman not eating his neck. He felt it. The gun, he finally got a hold of the gun and twirled it around on the kitchen floor to grip the handle. He directed it right at Karen’s head. Specifically her jaw. This was his first official time using it, and his adrenaline was pumping so hard he could’ve punched a hole into a brick wall. When he bought it, he didn’t expect to be using it at such a… close range. So his aim was a little….off. He pulled the trigger and with a loud ‘BANG,’ blew her jaw into a thousand pieces. Her skin, muscle, teeth and tongue sprayed over the floor, table and chairs. The table looked like it belonged in a museum, spattered in blood. One of those strange art pieces that you “get it or you don’t.” Karen was still on him. He didn’t know what she could do to him at this point since her jaw was there, but she was doing a decent job of getting a disgusting viscous fluid on his shirt and neck. By the look on her face though, she didn’t even feel it. The other woman went down in one shot, why was this one so much more durable? Evan got one more bright idea. If this didn’t work, nothing would. He jammed the barrel of the gun into her newly modeled cranial cavity, a.k.a her now extremely huge mouth, and pulled the trigger again. Brains and other matter popped through the other side of her head, onto the floor, walls and ceiling behind them including Josh. His body was already desecrated almost to the point of being unrecognizable, a little more blood wouldn’t hurt. Besides, even more fluids got on Evan again and he didn’t ask for this. So there, Josh.

Evan was in shock. He must’ve been because anybody not in shock would’ve pushed the dead body off of them by now. Evan stayed in the same spot for a moment, smoke from the gun barrel rising from the hole in the back of Karen’s head. Her body was limp. He finally did it. He had killed a woman. Two, actually. Hooray. He lifted her up a little higher and tossed her off of him at last. He laid in the same spot still. His head rested on the floor for a moment. What just happened? What the hell just happened? Evan stood up to assess the damage. Two women and Josh dead, check. Blood, brain matter and God knows what else all over my chest and face, check. Bathroom break, about to check that off.

Washing the crap off of his face was a little more difficult than expected. Evan needed to be extra careful not to get anything in his eyes and mouth. The worst part about washing it off though, was realizing how much was in his hair. He pulled out a hard, white fragment. What IS this? Part of a jaw? It’s small enough to be part of a tooth. Maybe jawbone? Whatever it is, it’s in the toilet now. Right after dropping it in there, Evan felt bad for a moment; dropping part of a woman’s face in the toilet. But she tried to kill him so it’s justified, right? Any guilt he felt was diminished when he pulled out what looked like a small strand of spaghetti impacted to the hair on top of his head. He could’ve thrown up. He started smelling stenches that weren’t there before but all of a sudden became extremely noticeable. Whatever, this place is disgusting. If he was imagining smells or just started noticing them, he had to get out of here. He zipped up his jacket. A few blood drops and smears but nothing too bad. He could still wear it. Wait, does blood wash out? Do you have to use a certain detergent? He hadn’t dealt with blood stains in a while. Either way, he looked casual with the jacket zipped up. He would take it off and then his blood stained shirt before Renee saw. No problem. Time to go.

Evan slid himself out the backdoor and around the pool as fast as humanly possible without crashing through and looking somewhat normal. He quickly walked through the backyard but started to look more and more like a guilty child as he thought about what could be lurking right around him. Screw this, I’m not walking. Evan broke into a full sprint and jumped over the pointlessly short fence separating his and Josh’s yard.

Renee was still looking out the window. It had felt like forever and she had already had two cups of coffee. She was jittery. Partly because of the situation but mostly from the coffee. She watched in confusion as Evan walked from the back door quickly and speed walk for a few feet before jumping into a full sprint and jumping over the fence. She knew he was physically capable but she didn’t think he’d be able to jump like that. He looked like a guilty child. As she saw him near the door, she ran over to unlock it. Evan still beat her to it and knocked silently and impatiently repeatedly until she answered. Renee unlocked the door and Evan slid a little more of himself inside with every inch of the door that was open. With the already tense situation, the coffee, and then seeing her husband run across the yard like a seven year old running from the neighborhood dog, she was ready to freak out.

“Why are you running? What happened?? Did Josh’s phone work??”

Evan was trying to catch his breath while simultaneously thinking of an answer that would scare her the least. This was going to be tough. “I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know…”

“What? What’s wrong with you?”

Evan didn’t answer and locked the door back as though someone was right behind him trying to get in. That might’ve been the worst answer to give. What he said next furthered his repertoire of bad answers at bad times. “Help me lock all the doors.”

“They are locked. What happened over there?”

“All of them?”

“Yes!” Renee was losing patience. Coffee and an evasive-answering husband will do that.

“Well, double check. Help me turn off all the lights. We’re using as little lighting as possible. Candles or something, do we have candles?

Renee got stern. Time to break out the irritated mother routine. If he was going to act like a kid, she’d treat him like one. “EVAN- TELL ME WHAT’S WRONG.”

Evan was in state of complete disorganization. “Renee, would you please just…I don’t…”

“WHAT?”

 He’d have to keep this a secret. He couldn’t actually tell her what had just happened. It wouldn’t do her any good to let her know that life just went from cautious to horrible. Killing two women and finding their neighbor eaten was bad enough, but the state of the women who did it was the strangest part. Alive and dead. Dead or dying. Dead and dying, at the same time. Of course he’d keep this a secret from her. He didn’t even see it as an option. And even if he were to tell her, he’d have to break it to her easily. As easily as possible.

“JOSH IS DEAD! Okay?? He’s DEAD, and I just KILLED two women!

Renee quickly shook her head. He knew she heard him, but would have trouble processing it. She asked, “You what?”

I just killed two women but… it’s like… they weren’t people. They weren’t normal, they were like animals.

“Evan, WHAT are you talking about? Just calm down and think about what you want to say, you’re not making any sense-“

“YES I AM! JUST-“

He paused. He didn’t mean to yell so much, especially at her, but his adrenaline was still overrunning his brain. That’s a good excuse, right? Yeah, that’s excusable. Renee’s eyes were big and she appeared altogether confused. Scared is a better word. Evan saw this and tried to make more sense. He owed it to her. But who owed it to him to make more sense?

“Look, I’m sorry okay? I don’t know what just happened to me. I don’t know how to explain this.”

“Alright, well, start at the beginning. What happened when you walked in?”

Evan started thinking more clearly. Renee was a nurse, she was good at calming people down in general. Specifically when she didn’t know what was going on, like with her patients. She didn’t have to know what was going on to ease the situation. It was better that way, so she wouldn’t freak herself out.

“Alright, right. Okay. Yeah, the door was open. So I walked in and I went to the kitchen because I heard a noise. And when I got there, he was….he was lying there. Josh was just lying there and that woman, that woman Josh was with earlier, the one who was sick, you know? Remember when I said she looked sick?”

“Yes…?”

“Well, she was…” Evan started making hand gestures toward his mouth as if he were piling food in his mouth. He needed to really “put her in the moment.”

“…over him. And she was…”

He didn’t want to finish. “…EATING him. I mean, actually eating him.”

Renee stared for a moment before letting out a heavy sigh.

“Evan, that’s not funny.”

She started walking back to the kitchen. He imagined several different reactions but for some reason, it never entered his mind that she wouldn’t take it seriously. Why would she not take this seriously?

“WHAT?!”

Renee turned back around. She wasn’t done.

“You shouldn’t joke like that, you scared me! You know that report on the news scared me earlier, that is not funny! I was actually thinking we could mess around tonight.

“I am not joking, I….WHAT??” Evan collected himself. Think straight, think, think straight. But it could be so hard sometimes. That’s what she said. NO! Breathe. Think. Explain. “Will you listen to me, please??”

Renee stopped pouring another cup of coffee and crossed her arms. Her face said “whatever” and her attitude suggested she was going to hear him out but not necessarily listen.

Evan exhaled. “Thank you! Now, listen…that woman, the sick one- she was over him and her eyes were this strange color. She looked dead okay? Like the people on the news. There was blood everywhere.”

Renee rolled her eyes again but Evan didn’t see it. He was too busy putting himself back in the moment. The moment that happened five minutes ago yet already felt like it was a long time ago. “…but when she saw me, she started coming toward me, like the people on the news, you know? She kept coming toward me and I told her to stop, but she wouldn’t listen and then another woman came out-“

“Another woman? That figures.”

“Listen, she came out and they wouldn’t listen to me, so I shot them.”

“You WHAT??”

“Look, I’m sorry, okay? I know what I said to you but-“

“Where is it then? Did you leave it there?

Evan gauged Renee’s attitude to see what she was getting out. Shooting Josh’s “ladies of the night” didn’t seem to be a big a deal as whether or not he actually had a gun. He quickly pulled out his now used Jericho and showed her. She gasped. She seemed a little impressed but now wasn’t the time to say “Pretty cool, huh?”

“You took it with you?”

Evan was taken aback. She evidently thought he didn’t own the gun, but used one Josh had. This works. “Well, I thought we might need it and he wasn’t going to use because you know- he’s dead, so I…”

Renee wasn’t listening anymore. She was staring down Evan’s neck and shirt, then jacket. There was blood. Not much, but she could see it. “What is this?” Renee pointed at the little droplets scattered on Evan’s jacket. He paused and took a breath. He could only say it so many times.

“It’s that woman’s blood. I told you. There were two women in Josh’s house. They attacked me. I shot them. THEY’RE dead. THIS is their blood.

Renee unzipped his jacket to see what looked like a water balloon full of blood had popped over his shirt. It didn’t seem that much to him until he saw her reaction. She touched it and felt the wetness on her fingers. “Ew, ew, EW! Take it off! Take it off now!”

Evan took off his shirt and started to change into a new one, tossing his blood stained shirt on the floor. Renee gasped. “What’re you doing??”

Evan looked up, confused. He shook his head. “What?”

“Um, HELLO, your shirt. It’s got blood on it and you put it on the carpet?? That goes in the trash.”

Evan rolled his eyes. “Renee- I do not even care about-“

A knock on the back door. Evan stopped mid-sentence. Renee stared at Evan, wide-eyed. He didn’t want to seem as startled as she was but stopping in mid-sentence had already given him away, more or less.

“Did you hear that?” He asked.

“Of course I heard that, it’s still happening!” Renee answered in a loud whisper. The couple stared at each other for a moment until they realized the sound wasn’t stopping. They slowly crept around the corner, Evan first, Renee gripping his recently dried undershirt. The knocking continued. Then, a voice. “Evan? Hey, Evan? Renee? Anybody?” Evan squinted his eyes and even in the dark, recognized their neighbor Ben and someone else but he couldn’t make them out. Renee couldn’t see as well. Her contacts were bothering her. “Who is it?”

“It’s Ben. From next door. And someone else. Should we let them in?”

It’s Ben, we know him, why wouldn’t we?” Evan paused for a second. He thought of several reasons to not let Ben in. For one, the guy was a jerk. Secondly, and more importantly, there was a terrorist attack of some kind making certain people attack each other and for all they know, Ben had it. Then again, he was ex-military. He might have a better idea of what was going on. If he knew anything, that’d be a better than what we know now. Evan went toward the door, cracking it open. Ben limped in as soon as he could, a much shorter blonde woman followed a second after. It was Lisa from three houses down. The whole neighborhood was coming over. The ones that weren’t dead anyway. Ben was in his late thirties. He had been retired from the Army but still kept his hair cut close like back in the day. He always kept a five o’clock shadow though and it was always about the same length on the hair on the top of his head. He was wearing his trademark grey “ARMY” shirt. Evan always felt like his own 5’11 stature was tall enough until he stood next to Ben. Anybody that was over 6’1 made him feel short and Ben was 6’3. His physique also did more than suggest he spent a lot of his time working on his body. Guy was ripped. He was limping though. Evan didn’t think to ask why. He didn’t really care to talk to Ben if he didn’t have to. The man only really spent time with his car. Definitely not a people person.

Lisa on the other hand, was something of a trophy wife without actually being a wife anymore. Not the kind you see with the massive fake lips and fake everything else, but the kind who seemed like she would’ve married her high school sweetheart who would’ve happened to go on to become a football sensation. Actually, that’s something similar to what did happen. But once they were married and produced a funny blonde kid named Mason, the star athlete husband was found with two other women. So Lisa took her kid and moved down here. Renee knew more about her than Evan or Ben but everybody knew the “basics.” She was wearing an oversized jacket that made it look like she wasn’t wearing pants. She was in her early thirties, only a couple years older than Evan and Renee but she seemed a lot younger. Especially with the way she dressed. Not tacky, but definitely younger than what a lot women her age were wearing. A lot like a single mom would dress. Evan didn’t know how to greet his neighbors in such a situation as this.

“Uh, hey guys. What’s up?”

Ben was the first to answer. He was always the “take charge” type. Some would mistake it for being a control freak. “Thank God, we didn’t see anyone else. We thought it was just us left. We saw you come in just now from my backdoor. “

Lisa spoke up. “Thank you, we don’t know what we woulda done if you weren’t home.”

Renee was confused, taking the words out of Evan’s mouth. “What do you mean? What’s wrong with you guys’ houses? Where’s Mason, Lisa?”

“He… I don’t know, I…” Lisa covered her mouth. Ah, crap, she was going to cry. Of course it was understandable. When Evan realized this he suddenly became quietly surprised Renee hadn’t cried yet. Then again, Renee would’ve cried if she could to make herself feel better, but she didn’t know enough about the situation to perform such an action. Maybe when she hears what’s happened to Mason, she’ll join in. Insensitive? Maybe.

Lisa continued. “He went on his field trip today and, and, I haven’t heard from anybody since. I’ve tried everything but I can’t get a hold of anybody so I don’t know what to do, I don’t who I’m supposed to talk to, I don’t know where he is…”

Ben leaned into Evan and quietly whispered “Who’s Mason?”

“Her kid.”

 Renee spoke about as unsure as anyone could and said “Oh, Lisa, I’m sure he’s okay. Come in here, let’s talk or a second.”

Renee and Lisa walked into the living room, Renee’s hand on Lisa’s back. Evan stood next to Big Bad Buff Ben. On one hand, he was thankful Renee took Lisa somewhere else, Evan wouldn’t of know how to console her…but on the other hand, Evan didn’t really like Ben and now he was alone with him. Thank you, Renee! Leave me in the same room as the guy who you couldn’t PAY to have a conversation with! Evan hated being left alone in the same room with people who could make any conversation awkward but he needed to get what he could out of Ben, if anything.

“Hey man, do you have a phone on you or anything?”

Ben answered coldly and quickly. Exactly what Evan expected to hear and even in the same tone of voice he imagined. “Phones are no good. Not the house, not the cells. Have you run into any of these things they’ve been showing in the news?”

“What things?”

“The sick people. The infected people, come on, man.”

Evan was a little annoyed by this. There are a thousand freaking things on the news, God knows what’s been shown in the past ten minutes even if he wasn’t getting it at his house.

“Yeah, two of them. At Josh’s house.”

“Who’s Josh?”

“The guy who lives behind us.”

  Ben actually took a couple steps back. “Did they bite you?”

Evan shook his head. “One of them was trying. Why?”

“Where are those two now? The two you saw?”

“They’re dead now. They’re still in the house.”

Ben was like a machine. “Have you been watching the news?”

Evan’s eyebrows heightened. “Is it on?”

“Off and on. They’ve said to destroy the brain. That’s the only way to kill them. Otherwise, they won’t stop.”

There was a spark of recognition in Evan’s eyes. He knew this was true.

“That’s what happened! I shot one of them and she just kept coming at me! When I got her in the head, that’s when she actually died.”

Renee came in Lisa not far behind. Renee made obvious she had heard from the look on her face. She always had a seemingly supernatural ability to hear things when she wasn’t anywhere close to listening range. Her ears weren’t that big either. Funny how that works. Evan would’ve rather known a lot more on the situation before Renee were to involve herself any further. It was the leader in him. Or, in his own way, the control freak in him. Although he would never want to be compared to Ben in any way. Either way, Renee heard and was involved now.

“Wait- the news is encouraging people to shoot each other?

Ben had all the answers, apparently. “Not people. And the cannibals have started popping up everywhere.”

The word “cannibal” threw Evan off completely. Whenever he heard that word, he imagined Bugs Bunny in a boiling pot with black guy in a Tiki mask. “That’s what they are? Cannibals? No, there’s got to be more to it than that. I saw them. They’re not really even people.

Ben straightened up. For all the rest of them knew, Ben didn’t know anything. But the other three were willing to listen to anything if it meant understanding the situation better. “You’re damn right they’re not. They’re the sick people from the cruise ship and they’re getting everyone else sick too.”

Evan squinted his eyes. What kind of illness would make somebody try to eat another? “The Episcopalian or whatever? They let all those people out of quarantine?”

Ben seemed ready with all his answers as if they’d be rehearsed. “Nobody let anything happen. It’s all out of control.”

“What’s out of control?” Renee asked.

Ben hesitated. “Everything.”