Movie Review: Movie 43

movie-43

Stars: Dennis Quaid, Greg Kinnear, Kate Winslet, Hugh Jackman, Liev Schreiber, Naomi Watts, Emma Stone, Kate Bosworth, Justin Long, Jason Sudeikis, Halle Berry, Stephen Merchant, Terrance Howard, Johnny Knoxville…

Rated R for strong pervasive crude and sexual content including dialogue, graphic nudity, language, some violence and drug use, Running time 90 minutes, Comedy

Compare to: The Kentucky Fried Movie (1977)

Whenever a film is marketed with the strategy of shoving giant words in your face that say things like “MOST OFFENSIVE MOVIE EVER” or “Critics are calling it ‘DISGUSTING. REPULSIVE. HILARIOUS.” it’s going to be a movie that has more underage kids sneaking into it than adults actually buying tickets. I feel a very short review coming on.

Movie 43 is a series of sketches, none of them connected save for a sketch about a man passing said sketches out to a studio executive as pitches for films. A massive A-list cast and eleven directors, Movie 43 will have you wondering how they were able to “get away with it.”

After the film, the friend I’d watched it with casually agreed that we don’t really need to talk about anything we’d just seen, because there was nothing to say. Here are a bunch of unrelated shorts that may or may not have a funny line in them, sure to have an actor or several in it that you recognize, and they may or may not go anywhere. Chances are…they don’t.

Evidently these shorts were filmed over the last few years. A segment would be filmed, then the project would be left alone, then picked up again when convenient, it seemed. This results in less-than-mediocre sketches that will have most viewers thinking “Wait, is this the whole sketch? He caught a leprechaun and it’s violent?” And your answer from me will always be, “Yep, that’s it.”

Some sketches I was especially confused about, because when it came to an end, there wasn’t usually a good finisher, it would just…end. The only reason you’ll be okay with this is that the skit won’t have been funny to begin with. There was one funny fake commercial about being nice to every day machines like ATMs and copiers because the kids inside are doing the best job they can do passing the paper out to you. It was funny but it lasted about two minutes out of an hour and forty. It will have followed a skit about Chloe Grace-Moretz (the fifteen year old from Let Me In, Dark Shadows) getting her first period while hanging out at her boyfriend’s house. The older brother and dad walk in and it’s really embarrassing for her. It’s about as funny as it sounds.

But what do you expect walking into a movie that’s trailer tells you nothing except how CRUDE THEY ARE! Come on, kids! That alone can hold a movie together for about five minutes. You’ll be interested in what you might see next until you see it, then you start to get the picture that this will be the entire movie.

Grade: F

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