Archive for April, 2016

Rogue One: Bothan Death Show

Posted in Videos! with tags , on 04/13/2016 by McCutcheon

“Many Bothans died to bring us this information.”

And with that SINGLE SENTENCE, Disney will make billions. But man! I can’t wait to meet the Bothans! I bet they’ll be a riot! Also, I auditioned for Star Wars and it’s hard to watch.

RELEVANT: Kurt Russell’s audition for A New Hope.

 

MUSIC CRITICS!!! ALL CAPS!!!

Posted in Videos! with tags , on 04/11/2016 by McCutcheon

“Hey, up-and-coming musician. Did you put your blood, sweat, and tears into this new album of yours? Meh, your ability to relay your life’s work really feels kinda ‘C-‘ to me.”

“Ooh, but that new Katy Perry EP is JUST what the doctor ordered! Four stars! All the thumbs up!”

Don’t get me wrong, it’s cool when musicians get favorable reviews and I’m sure those articles make them feel proud, as they should. I just don’t see why it matters to the rest of us.

The new Deftones is awesome, by the way.

For a related articles on critics, click this sentence.

Hardcore Henry (SPOILERS)

Posted in Reviews!, Videos! with tags , , , on 04/09/2016 by McCutcheon

Hardcore Henry, aka The Six Million Dollar Man meets Crank, was great and it really made me want to let out my inner beast.

However, after the first try at making this video and being told that I can’t use everything I’d spent the last few hours on, I decided it’s better for me to calm down and spend some time with nature. And the highway.

Also, somebody tell me how to pronounce Sharlto Copley’s name. I love that guy but I’ve never known if I’m saying his name right.

I Hate Chili’s

Posted in Videos! with tags on 04/07/2016 by McCutcheon

Ripping on Waffle House the other day wasn’t enough and it’s time to move up to the big leagues by describing why going to your favorite pepper-themed restaurant would sooner have me slam my head through plate glass than eat there.

But if it’s between eat there or watch 2005’s “Waiting,” I’m gonna have to choose the third option of the Great Unifier, aka “Death.”

Thank you to the old man that ruined Batman V Superman (BVS SPOILERS)

Posted in Videos! with tags , , on 04/05/2016 by McCutcheon

Title says it all. I want to thank the geezer who figured he’d save me two and a half hours of Batman V Superman before I even walked in the door. Doing God’s work, really.

Not Yer Daddy’s Tattoo Advice

Posted in Podcasts with tags , on 04/01/2016 by McCutcheon

However, it may be your mother’s tattoo advice. After several years of getting-tattooed experience, there’s some stuff you don’t find out until you’ve already gone through it. Here’s some stuff.